Romance & Cigarettes (2005)

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”Two, two things a man should know how to do. Be romantic and smoke his brains out.”
And now for something completely different . . .

What a curious dramedy-romance-musical with the most unlikely of all characters and actors.

Nick Murder (James Gandolfini) -- an overweight, heavy-smoking NYC ironworker -- is married to seamstress Kitty (Susan Sarandon) but having a passionate affair with bawdy Brit Tula (Kate Winslet).

Tossed out by Kitty, can Nick redeem himself and return to the bosom of his family?

When all else fails, someone turns to spewing poetry or song or dancing in the streets.

Also in the cast are Mandy Moore, Mary Louise Parker, and Aida Tuturro as Nick and Kitty’s grungy rock daughters; Steve Buscemi as Nick’s philosophical coworkers; Bobby Cannavale as the boyfriend of one of the daughters; Christopher Walken as Kitty’s protective cousin Bo; Elaine Stritch as Nick’s mother; Eddie Izzard as Kitty’s minister; and Amy Sedaris as Kitty’s friend.

Terrific music by Janis Joplin, Tom Jones, Engelbert Humperdink, Dusty Springfield, Elvis, Cyndi Lauper, Connie Francis, Bruce Springsteen, James Brown, Vikki Carr, Buena Vista Social Club, and some Charles Bukowski poetry throw in, too.

Produced by the Coen brothers, but with free-rein given to writer-director John Turturro.

Run time: 1 hour, 48 minute

Rated R.

My personal rating: B

Snow Angels (2007)

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"Each step is an anticipation of the next."

The life of teenager Arthur Parkinson (Michael Angarano) is interwined with the life of his former childhood babysitter, Annie Marchand (Kate Beckinsale), as they work together at a Chinese cafe in a small western Pennsylvania town.

Annie, who is estranged from her fragile husband Glenn (Sam Rockwell), has been having an affair with Nate Petite (Nicky Katt), the husband of her friend and co-worker Barb (Amy Sedaris). When Barb finds out, Annie blames Nate for giving Barb her name. While fighting over this, Glenn arrives at Annie's house, drunk, and angry that Nate is with his wife. Annie tells both of them to go away.

Later, when Annie and Glenn's four-year-old daughter Tara (Gracie Hudson) goes mising, both Glenn and Nate are suspects. Arthur and his classmates participate in the search. All of their lives are forever changed by the outcome.

Also appearing are Jeanetta Arnette and Griffin Dunne as Arthur's recently separated parents, and Olivia Thirlby as Arthur's new girlfriend.

Screenplay and directed by David Gordon Green.

Run time: 1 hour, 50 minutes

Rated R for language, some violent content, brief sexuality and drug use.

My personal rating: C+

Dedication (2007)

"I've spent my whole life wanting something and doing my very best not to find it. Never even going near the places it might be, and suddenly I got the god damn thing practically chained around my neck."

Billed as a romantic comedy, this is the quirky story of neurotic children's book writer Henry Roth (Billy Crudup) who is chronically in writer's block and a frustration to his only friend and long-time collaborating illustrator Rudy Holt (Tom Wilkinson).

When Rudy dies, Henry is devastated and uncertain he can continue on the book whose deadline is looming. But his editor (Bob Balaban) demands that he settle in with a new collaborator and get the job done.

The obsessive-compulsive, misanthrope Henry, who is also a misogynist, is not at all happy about working with the unproven young illustrator the editor sends over to Henry.

Lucy Reilly (Mandy Moore) just wants to sink herself in her work to help her get over the boyfriend who dumped her two years before. When the former lover, Jeremy (Martin Freeman), returns to tempt her, Lucy must decide what she's going to do while also dealing with Henry's annoying idiosyncrasies and the deadline approaching.

Also starring Christine Taylor, Amy Sedaris, Dianne Wiest.

Directed by Justin Theroux.

Run time: 1 hour, 35 minutes

Rated R for language and some sexual content.

My personal rating: B-

I Want Someone to Eat Cheese With (2006)

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I really enjoy Curb Your Enthusiasm and I usually like films that are off the wall, but I discovered why I'd never heard of CYE's veteran Jeff Garlin's flick. Because it's all cheese with nothing at all to chew on.

As writer, director and lead actor in this meandering Milk Dud, Garlin needs to bear the blame. The whole thing seems to be one long Second City improv that goes nowhere -- but not fast enough.

The premise is that 39-year-old James Aaron (Garlin) still lives with his mother in a small Chicago apartment while doing improv at The Second City and trying to get acting gigs elsewhere. He's failing at his work, has certainly failed in establishing any kind of romantic relationship, and consoles himself with food to the point of morbid obesity.

Conversations with his friend Luca (David Pasquesi) and pathetic attempts at flirting with women seem to be his main activities. He visits Luca's daughter's (Elle Fanning) grade school classroom on career day to tell the kids about his job but he makes some crude remarks that cause the teacher Stella Lewis (Bonnie Hunt) to send James to the school therapist (Amy Sedaris) where James is told that Stella is a "chubby chaser." This only causes him to flirt more with Stella.

He also engages in a strange relationship with Beth (Sarah Silverman), an ice cream shop clerk who gives him free ice cream.

The rest of the film is mostly lackluster cameo spots filled with Garlin's old Second City chums and other comic pals: Dan Castellaneta, Paul Mazursky, Tim Kazurinsky, Joey Slotnick, Richard Klein, Wallace Langham, Gina Gershon, and others.

Do yourself a favor and skip this flick in favor of a pizza or a trip to the gym.

My personal rating: D